Saturday, March 5, 2011

Hardest thing and tough decisions...

Have a child is seriously the toughest thing I have ever done in my life. I can't begin to explain how it effects you mentally, emotionally, physical and spiritually. The thought of doing it again soon makes me nauseous. I'm not saying we won't ever have another child but the idea of that happening in the near future is too much for me to handle.
If you don't know our history, I have PCOS (polycystic ovarian syndrome). It took us nearly 9 months to conceive our little one. I truly believe that it was in God's timing and that he gave the doctors wisdom to know what would allow us to conceive. So, then enters the dilemma of birth control. I HATE what the pill does to me. I am guaranteed to have one week of being a you know what from you know where. This doesn't sit well with the hubby or me for that matter. Then we have to be careful of which pill because I am breastfeeding. Since I am now staying home and we are on one income, price is also a factor.
Here is what God has finally hit me with. No matter which form we choose, God is still in control. Women get pregnant everyday being on any form of Birth Control. Women who have PCOS get pregnant, sometimes even faster after having a child. Women get pregnant against all odds. So, even though I think there is no way in the world we could have another baby anytime soon without me going into a mental house....God knows what is best. Now all I have to do is remember that. Don't get me wrong, I am totally in love with my daughter and being a mom. It is just overwhelming to think about doing it all again with having one at home...
I realize this is a random post. Believe it or not I do have a crafty post coming very very soon!

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